Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Jewelry
A sanguine surrounded by melancholics, I alone among them have a short memory for the stings and pangs of life experiences. I hope I learn from them (and I hope I am learning from them), but I have to say with honesty that not a whole lot remains with me from past relationships. Already a face I never see has faded from my mind--not that I won't recognize it when I see it next, but it cannot haunt my dreams due to its being shoved behind other faces I see more frequently--a voice, a touch, a smell. I can observe the obliteration of these remembrances almost as it occurs. Nevertheless, one thing always stays with me from my old boyfriends: the jewelry they gave me. Trinkets! Artifacts! I keep what I like of them, and wear them now and then.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Top Ten Post-Breakup Activites
Our time is precious. There's always the feeling after a relationship self-destructs and explodes into smithereens that the time invested was a waste. It wasn't. On the other hand, being newly single (in the most singly single sense) gives you a lot of time to pursue, enjoy, and seize some of the aspects of life you may have been shuffling to the background. So, in reverse order, here is my list of things to do with the increase of free time:
10. Get a Cold. You might not think it, but perhaps in the stress of relationship your body has been withstanding that latest airborne virus. The new relaxation of the single state is the perfect time to acquire the symptoms: itchy throat, runny nose, headache. Don't run for the over-the-counter medication, either. Relish the opportunity to nurse yourself back to health with fresh garlic, hot soups and teas, and fruit juices.
9. Blog Again. Let's face it, if things are going well there's no need to blog. We all know that. However, now your life is a rich melange of interesting and multi-textured elements. It's the perfect time to send your once-again complex aroma out into cyberspace.
8. Spiritual Reading. I know this one should go higher on the list, but perhaps you've already got your Rosary and Scriptural meditation to worry about--now is the perfect time to bolster that or whatever other spiritual practices you have with some words of encouragement. Pick a book with a positive message, no need to emphasize humility at this time!! For my birthday last week, I received Searching for and Maintaining Peace by Jacques Philippe; it's great so far.
7. Go Out to Eat. Especially in the days right after my break up, I felt a great desire to be pampered and not to cook. So I didn't. Of course, you don't want to take the take-out to extremes--just a few fun lunches should do the trick.
6. Chat with Friends. This item dovetails nicely with the previous: have dinner with a good friend or friends. Discuss your woes in vivid detail and listen to the advice from those older and wiser. I can't overestimate how important friends are.
5. Wear Pretty Clothes. You might not have the motivation to fix your hair or put on makeup (though if you do that's great), yet pretty and flattering clothes are only a closet-hop away! Put on something colorful and cheery. Make the most of the season's iconic colors, patterns, and textures--bundle up if it is fall or winter in your favorite coat or jacket. Dress your look up with fun scarves and accessories too! It's very cathartic, and the compliments you'll get on your outfit are a fun perk too.
4. Take Care of Others. By far the best way to forget your troubles is to engross yourself in another's cares and concerns, which are likely much worse than your own. It's handy to have one of your friends break a bone or become ill--you can then look after her to your heart's content!
3. Clean Your Room. You had no time before. You do now.
2. Rediscover Your Passion. Don't force this one, but there must be something in your life that motivates you and keeps you going and you will need to find it sooner or later. Gently urge yourself back to the thing you've been secretly, or not so secretly, wanting for a while. Make plans. Get your life in an order that supports that desire.
1. Pray. Always.
10. Get a Cold. You might not think it, but perhaps in the stress of relationship your body has been withstanding that latest airborne virus. The new relaxation of the single state is the perfect time to acquire the symptoms: itchy throat, runny nose, headache. Don't run for the over-the-counter medication, either. Relish the opportunity to nurse yourself back to health with fresh garlic, hot soups and teas, and fruit juices.
9. Blog Again. Let's face it, if things are going well there's no need to blog. We all know that. However, now your life is a rich melange of interesting and multi-textured elements. It's the perfect time to send your once-again complex aroma out into cyberspace.
8. Spiritual Reading. I know this one should go higher on the list, but perhaps you've already got your Rosary and Scriptural meditation to worry about--now is the perfect time to bolster that or whatever other spiritual practices you have with some words of encouragement. Pick a book with a positive message, no need to emphasize humility at this time!! For my birthday last week, I received Searching for and Maintaining Peace by Jacques Philippe; it's great so far.
7. Go Out to Eat. Especially in the days right after my break up, I felt a great desire to be pampered and not to cook. So I didn't. Of course, you don't want to take the take-out to extremes--just a few fun lunches should do the trick.
6. Chat with Friends. This item dovetails nicely with the previous: have dinner with a good friend or friends. Discuss your woes in vivid detail and listen to the advice from those older and wiser. I can't overestimate how important friends are.
5. Wear Pretty Clothes. You might not have the motivation to fix your hair or put on makeup (though if you do that's great), yet pretty and flattering clothes are only a closet-hop away! Put on something colorful and cheery. Make the most of the season's iconic colors, patterns, and textures--bundle up if it is fall or winter in your favorite coat or jacket. Dress your look up with fun scarves and accessories too! It's very cathartic, and the compliments you'll get on your outfit are a fun perk too.
4. Take Care of Others. By far the best way to forget your troubles is to engross yourself in another's cares and concerns, which are likely much worse than your own. It's handy to have one of your friends break a bone or become ill--you can then look after her to your heart's content!
3. Clean Your Room. You had no time before. You do now.
2. Rediscover Your Passion. Don't force this one, but there must be something in your life that motivates you and keeps you going and you will need to find it sooner or later. Gently urge yourself back to the thing you've been secretly, or not so secretly, wanting for a while. Make plans. Get your life in an order that supports that desire.
1. Pray. Always.
Friday, November 5, 2010
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